NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) - Just days after tying the knot after years of abstinence, Kevin Jonas of the pop sensation the Jonas Brothers stunned his teenaged fans by announcing that “to be honest about it, sex was not worth the wait.”
“After we did it, I was kind of like, that’s it?” Mr. Jonas told reporters at a New York press conference.
As to whether Mr. Jonas’ bride agreed with his “that’s it?” assessment, Mr. Jonas remarked, “That’s what she said.”
And I’m guessing their first marital spat will begin in 5…4…3…
Sex: You’re doing it wrong.
because he’s gay!
DUH
-
groomcryptic liked this
-
spiritedunwa liked this
-
p90x-workout liked this
-
izkstrn liked this
-
xmarksthefuckingspot liked this
-
twelvefootmountaintroll reblogged this from loverwife and added:
“Sex: You’re doing it wrong.” Really though.
-
someweartostorethings reblogged this from yeahiwasintheshit
-
iwanttogototheree liked this
-
absolutelyfabregas liked this
-
amandaismoving liked this
-
tomorrowmaybe liked this
-
loverwife reblogged this from fourfeathered
-
fourfeathered reblogged this from thisiswhyyourestillsingle
-
darknessthereandnothingmore liked this
-
blindcrow liked this
-
bloosy liked this
-
aliuribe liked this
-
winzer reblogged this from beckysanspants and added:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHA OH MY GOD TELL ME THIS IS REAL
-
ragtimemouse reblogged this from thisiswhyyourestillsingle and added:
can’t imagine how horrible...wedding night would be...two...
-
teamlimabean liked this
-
peenmonger liked this
-
planktonswife liked this
-
onedumbjoke liked this
-
obladeeobladah liked this
-
totesinappropes liked this
-
paulina liked this
-
ilaned liked this
-
diaryofarecoveredteenagewhore liked this
-
johnwilkestooth liked this
-
dooj liked this
-
craftyhippo liked this
-
angiefu liked this
-
youandmeshouldbealone reblogged this from thisiswhyyourestillsingle and added:
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH OH SHIT SON
-
spoocyma reblogged this from pugparty and added:
OH GOD NOT UP THE BUTT NOOOOOOOO maybe he married somebody he’s completely sexually incompatible with. that’s why i...
-
yelhsamonet liked this
-
jenepensepas liked this
-
keepupthegoodtwerk liked this
-
tiefightervstheenterprise liked this
-
themanwhoforgot liked this
-
juliepowers liked this
-
allthatjasmine reblogged this from thisiswhyyourestillsingle and added:
because he’s gay! DUH
-
allthatjasmine liked this
-
tooslowtiffany reblogged this from thisiswhyyourestillsingle
-
thisiswhyyourestillsingle reblogged this from boyfriend-free and added:
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) - Just days after tying...knot after years of abstinence,...
-
brittanybelt liked this
-
heyitscat reblogged this from boyfriend-free
-
katayo reblogged this from ki-oui
-
boyfriend-free reblogged this from ilikeyourwigjanice and added:
Sex: You’re doing it wrong.
-
ki-oui reblogged this from brittany-houhoulis
-
mylifeaskayla reblogged this from riandawson
- Show more notes